Let me tell you about someone in my office – lets call him OE.
OE started work in this part of the world 2 years ago, having asked for a transfer from the Corporate office to Singapore. When people ask him, he would gladly share that it is because he wants to impart his knowledge and skillsets to other people. And seeing that this part of the world does not have someone in the region doing this sort of work, he volunteered to come.
Oh please, if it is not an expat package, will you come?? You are coming to ‘our part of the world’ so that your children can get their schoolfees covered, your wife can tag along and have tropical weather all year round and you get paid double! So don’t tell me it is about imparting your knowledge because in the 2 years that you have been here, I have not seen a single email from you about how you can help the organisation. Or help anyone, for that matter.
Every office has this type of people : these are the typical responses they will give you whenever someone goes to them –
a. ” Sorry, this is not my field of expertise. If I were to help you, the information that I have would not be accurate. ”
b. ” Sorry, this is not an area that I can advise on, why don’t you write to Corporate for help? Please remember to copy me on it. Even if I can’t help, I would like to know the solution and learn.”
c. “Sorry, it seems that you are the only one who is having this issue. I can’t help you if it is a UNIQUE problem. ”
d. ” I am really busy right now, maybe others can help you with it while I work on some initiatives for the corporate office. ”
He is never in the office, and when he is, you can be sure he makes his presence known. He will go around and talk very loudly to everyone and say things like – ” oh I did not see you at the company bbq last Saturday, you should really put more effort into bonding with your colleagues”. And you see jaws drop.
And his daughter comes to work every Wednesday afternoon, I have no idea why. Nobody else does that and she speaks very loudly in the corridors like it is her freaking playground. Nobody says anything either.
Today he really pissed me off. It was his birthday and he showed up for work. His secretary bought him a cake and demanded that everyone drop whatever we are doing, to sing him his birthday song. Guess what? I didn’t bother. Neither did 95% of my other colleagues. What did he expect? Overwhelming wishes of happiness?
Needless to say, he was very unhappy and he came to me with a slice of cake on a miserable paper plate and put it in front of me and when I opened my mouth to refuse – guess what he said?
“OH, I FORGOT YOU DIDN’T COME TO THE PANTRY TO SING ME MY SONG, YOU DON’T GET CAKE.”